Where Do Your Limiting Beliefs Come From
Have you ever felt like no matter how hard you try, you can’t break through certain barriers? These mental blocks are often the result of limiting beliefs—those deeply held convictions that keep you stuck in the same patterns, preventing personal and professional growth.”
Childhood Conditioning
Limiting beliefs often originate in childhood from family, teachers, and authority figures.
You’re essentially a smartphone out of the box when you’re born. You come with an operating system, but no apps have been installed yet. Those apps are going to come from five sources. Your parents, TV, school teachers, friends and siblings.
At this point, roughly from age zero to seven, you don’t have what we call in hypnosis, a critical faculty. That’s essentially a filter, which is why children can be convinced to believe in Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, and the easter bunny.
Now, if a child constantly hears “money doesn’t grow on trees” or “you need to be realistic,” they may grow up with limiting beliefs about money and success. If you hear, “Why can’t you be smart like your sister?” or “You’re dumb,” you’ll probably grow up thinking you’re an imbecile.
If your parents constantly expressed doubt about your abilities, even unintentionally, you may have internalized that doubt and believe you aren’t capable of achieving specific goals.”
Cultural and Societal Expectations
Cultural norms and societal standards can reinforce limiting beliefs.
For instance, a woman might believe that leadership roles aren’t available to her because of ingrained gender biases.
In many cultures, the idea of ‘staying in your lane’ is a powerful message. These societal norms can cause people to believe they’re not meant for bigger roles, even if they possess the skills.
When I was training in Sweden, I ran into this. They really don’t like individuals who try to become super successful. As one of my Swedish trainers explained, Sweden’s culture encourages humility and modesty and frowns upon self-promotion. They call the concept Jantelagen, a Nordic code that discourages people from thinking they are better than others.
Past Experiences and Failures
Your failures, negative experiences, and trauma contribute significantly to your limiting beliefs.
When someone experiences failure, it can create a belief that they are not capable, and that belief becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Traumatic experiences, in particular, often reinforce a belief of helplessness or unworthiness.
If you’ve failed at launching a business before, you may carry the belief that you’re not cut out for entrepreneurship, even if the previous failure had more to do with external circumstances. So sad that more people aren’t aware of this. Almost every ultra-rich client I bodyguarded has failed multiple times. They pick themselves up, learn from it, and go again.
Fear of Judgment and Criticism
The fear of being judged or criticized by others can solidify limiting beliefs.
Many people don’t pursue goals or express their true desires because they fear what others might think. This fear, rooted in limiting beliefs, stops them from taking risks or speaking up. Look back at what I mentioned about Swedish culture above.
You may hesitate to ask for a promotion because, deep down, you believe others will think you’re arrogant or undeserving.
The Influence of Media and Social Media
Constant exposure to unrealistic standards through media can foster limiting beliefs.
Social media often portrays idealized versions of life, success, and beauty, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy. People compare themselves and believe they are not “enough”—not rich enough, talented enough, or attractive enough. Everyone seems to forget that what they’re watching on the internet is some influencer’s highlight reel.
Scrolling through Instagram can leave you feeling like everyone else is succeeding while you’re stuck. This comparison trap fuels the limiting belief that you’re somehow falling behind. Teens are suffering anxiety in unprecedented numbers due to this BS.
Self-Doubt and the Inner Critic
Your internal dialogue can also be one of the most potent sources of limiting beliefs.
Self-doubt often manifests through an inner critic constantly telling you you’re not good, smart, or talented enough. Over time, you begin to believe these internal narratives.
If you constantly tell yourself, “I’ll never be good at public speaking,” that thought becomes ingrained, preventing you from trying to improve.
How to Break Free from Limiting Beliefs
As a transformative coach, I run into clients with a lot of these. There are several ways to tackle the problem including techniques like reframing, hypnosis, NLP, and what I learned with the Lefkoe method.
In a nutshell, we work on where the belief came from. Next, we challenge it, looking for evidence that disproves it. Finally, we replace the limiting belief with a better, more empowering one.
Conclusion
Your limiting beliefs are often invisible barriers, but the good news is that they can be broken. If you’re ready to overcome the beliefs holding you back, consider partnering with a coach or trained professional who can guide you through the process.